recently.....
so i need to do 2 things in this post, the first one is it tell you how my weekend went and the second one is to just vent so yeah.
1. so my weekend was awsome actually friday was my birthday and that went really well it was an awsome day. it was also relay for life wich was really really fun. there was movies and ppl to talk to, and cass and nat and ppl threw a party in a tent for me with cupcakes and strawberries and pull and peels lol i think it was the best party ever, and i got to wear a crown and septer and glow stick braclets and a necklace lol it was really cool, i felt special. it rained at relay but only in the beginning, just enough to soak the tents lol but not much sleep happened anyways so its ok. we shall all just make a note of bringing tarps the next time. then on saturday i worked on our lating seminar project with cass and nat and mack and chris were there too because we were making a movie. lol apparently its an interesting movie. ( i will hopefully find a way to be out of the classroom while it is playing lol ) and then i hung out with george and we went swimming at the swimplex, which was really fun and i got to wear my bathing suit for the first time, and i love it from the bottom of my heart. then we came back to my place and george bbq'd hamburgers. then on sunday i went to chuch and then i had to work from 1-6 but ended up staying until 6:30 which is poop. yup. and today was my mothers birthday and yeah i had school which was ok i guess, and i also had an eye doctors appointment which was fine, my perscription hasnt really changed and apparently my sight is well enought that when i get my g1 it wont say that i have to wear my glasses which is cool. i like having that freedom. tho they pu some drops in my eye to make my pupils dilate and yeah walking outside was interesting i could barely open my eyes cause it was soo bright. i wouldnt have been able to go to rugby practice anyway even if my appointment hadnt gone until like 4:20. which was really late and by that time there was no point to go to rugby, lol i could see anyways, yeah so i went home and took a nap seeing as my eyes were really tired and my body was tried, i had a late night talking to george on the phone until 1 am lol. but it was soo worth the lost sleep.
OMG grey's anatomy today almost killed me! yeah i amost died from the tension at times! but it was such a good season finale! ack i cant wait untill it comes back on! lol oh man i am soo excited about pitch on friday! its going to be awsome. i have to wash my laundry so i have something to wear while i'm there lol. tee hee it shall be fun.
2. ok here is where i do the whole 2 personality switch thing. sooo i have been thinking and i realised that i have nothing to look forward to this summer. aside from not having school. i have nothing planned i have nothing to do. i am one of those ppl that live from event to event. and i need something to look forward to in each day otherwise i am not a happy person that day, even if its something small like a doctors appointment or my favourite tv show. i need them. but then there are also the bigger events that i need. things like relay and pitch and wonderland and athletic banguet. i thrive on ecxcitment like that. and i realised that this summer i will have none of those things. in my head its almost like there is nothing to live for. now i dont mean that im gonna kill myself because i dont have any fun things to do, i just mean that often its gonna be hard to wake up on mornings and carry on through the day if i have nothing to carry on to. i mean i have to get a job but really thats all ill have. all my tv shows will be over and school will be done. as will events with school and youth group. cass will be working and i'm sure she will have her like week of time when she goes camping in her trailer with her family. and natalie has her 2 weeks or so when she will do that too. and i mean yeah i will hang out with them sometimes and stuff but then there will also be the time when they will want to hang out in groups with mack and chris, and even tho that can be a lot of fun they they are great ppl, i dont want to be a 3rd wheel or a 5th wheel. honestly the only thing worse than that is when you dont get invited to something just because its going to be a couple thing. i mean ill be a couple too its just that my other half wont be in the same province, which let me just say sucks so much, you have no idea ( unless you are george, cause then you know). anyways i was just sitting here today and listining to a song and finished watching greys anatomy and this feeling that i just needed a hug came over me. i just want somebody to tell me that ill be alright. that this summer will not be the worst summer ever. that ill make it through. thats all.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty,
He said...no.
She asked him if he would want to be with her forever....
and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he replied with a no.
She had heard enough.
As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said....
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldn't cry if you left...I'd die...
1. so my weekend was awsome actually friday was my birthday and that went really well it was an awsome day. it was also relay for life wich was really really fun. there was movies and ppl to talk to, and cass and nat and ppl threw a party in a tent for me with cupcakes and strawberries and pull and peels lol i think it was the best party ever, and i got to wear a crown and septer and glow stick braclets and a necklace lol it was really cool, i felt special. it rained at relay but only in the beginning, just enough to soak the tents lol but not much sleep happened anyways so its ok. we shall all just make a note of bringing tarps the next time. then on saturday i worked on our lating seminar project with cass and nat and mack and chris were there too because we were making a movie. lol apparently its an interesting movie. ( i will hopefully find a way to be out of the classroom while it is playing lol ) and then i hung out with george and we went swimming at the swimplex, which was really fun and i got to wear my bathing suit for the first time, and i love it from the bottom of my heart. then we came back to my place and george bbq'd hamburgers. then on sunday i went to chuch and then i had to work from 1-6 but ended up staying until 6:30 which is poop. yup. and today was my mothers birthday and yeah i had school which was ok i guess, and i also had an eye doctors appointment which was fine, my perscription hasnt really changed and apparently my sight is well enought that when i get my g1 it wont say that i have to wear my glasses which is cool. i like having that freedom. tho they pu some drops in my eye to make my pupils dilate and yeah walking outside was interesting i could barely open my eyes cause it was soo bright. i wouldnt have been able to go to rugby practice anyway even if my appointment hadnt gone until like 4:20. which was really late and by that time there was no point to go to rugby, lol i could see anyways, yeah so i went home and took a nap seeing as my eyes were really tired and my body was tried, i had a late night talking to george on the phone until 1 am lol. but it was soo worth the lost sleep.
OMG grey's anatomy today almost killed me! yeah i amost died from the tension at times! but it was such a good season finale! ack i cant wait untill it comes back on! lol oh man i am soo excited about pitch on friday! its going to be awsome. i have to wash my laundry so i have something to wear while i'm there lol. tee hee it shall be fun.
2. ok here is where i do the whole 2 personality switch thing. sooo i have been thinking and i realised that i have nothing to look forward to this summer. aside from not having school. i have nothing planned i have nothing to do. i am one of those ppl that live from event to event. and i need something to look forward to in each day otherwise i am not a happy person that day, even if its something small like a doctors appointment or my favourite tv show. i need them. but then there are also the bigger events that i need. things like relay and pitch and wonderland and athletic banguet. i thrive on ecxcitment like that. and i realised that this summer i will have none of those things. in my head its almost like there is nothing to live for. now i dont mean that im gonna kill myself because i dont have any fun things to do, i just mean that often its gonna be hard to wake up on mornings and carry on through the day if i have nothing to carry on to. i mean i have to get a job but really thats all ill have. all my tv shows will be over and school will be done. as will events with school and youth group. cass will be working and i'm sure she will have her like week of time when she goes camping in her trailer with her family. and natalie has her 2 weeks or so when she will do that too. and i mean yeah i will hang out with them sometimes and stuff but then there will also be the time when they will want to hang out in groups with mack and chris, and even tho that can be a lot of fun they they are great ppl, i dont want to be a 3rd wheel or a 5th wheel. honestly the only thing worse than that is when you dont get invited to something just because its going to be a couple thing. i mean ill be a couple too its just that my other half wont be in the same province, which let me just say sucks so much, you have no idea ( unless you are george, cause then you know). anyways i was just sitting here today and listining to a song and finished watching greys anatomy and this feeling that i just needed a hug came over me. i just want somebody to tell me that ill be alright. that this summer will not be the worst summer ever. that ill make it through. thats all.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty,
He said...no.
She asked him if he would want to be with her forever....
and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he replied with a no.
She had heard enough.
As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said....
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldn't cry if you left...I'd die...
3 Comments:
it's probably going to be a long, hard summer for me, too. however, i do plan to come back and visit, possibly in August, for a week or two. feel free to come out and visit me. i will miss you terribly.
love, Brahm
oh! i love camping. i'm going camping in june with two of the guys to celebrate a birthday. chances are we won't sleep.... if we do, it will be a drunken stupor. just joking
update?
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